i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
