So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
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