"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
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