Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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