Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you win again, gameday.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize