it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
