Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
