I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
