Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
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