And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
