Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
did i walk over a car last night?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
false alarm, still single
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
