I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
