My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
