Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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