I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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