I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
