she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
