dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
