Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
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