I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
