Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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