K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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