my vag is so smooth its legendary
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize