haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
