Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry teleprompter hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(937): View more from Ohio

There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.

Fav 28 17223 1869
share tweet
(212): View more from New York

He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall

Fav 4 4324 1725
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(347): View more from New York

the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.

Fav 5 1150 2833
share tweet
(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?

Fav 7 2413 1188
share tweet
(314): View more from Missouri

I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario

Fav 3 2333 1579
share tweet
(208): View more from Idaho

the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.

Fav 7 1030 2191
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(910): View more from North Carolina

i just like, need to vent to someone

(919): View more from North Carolina

Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?

Fav 14 3025 2232
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(190): View more from

All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way

Fav 0 518 425
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(781): View more from Massachusetts

Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.

Fav 0 159 16
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT