see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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