She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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