Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
