she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
