Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
No subtext here. People are naked.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
