My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
