wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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