So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
