6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize