i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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