Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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