I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
