drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
