My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
