It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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