she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
where are you?
Hypothermia
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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