Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
