dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Come see our sink grown plant.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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