Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize