His hands were made for my vagina.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
