are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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