we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
