Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
