So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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