you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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