I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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