U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize